Softening the Edges With Compassion

I was recently rereading some of the pages in my book, Breaking Free From the Hustle for Worthiness, which I published in 2018. At that time, I had only grasped self-compassion at a surface level. I felt that the concept was meaningful, but I still had a lot of inner untangling and self-discovery to do before I could really understand the power of practicing and embodying it. As I read my words, I recognized just how much I’ve softened around the edges, and at my core, since then through practicing and embodying compassion. 

In our individualistic, judgmental, hard-charging, “win” at all costs world, compassion is not well-practiced or something that seems to be a priority. However, I believe when we practice it consistently, and embody it, it can give us everything we are searching and pushing so hard for. 

Compassion

Compassion is not a fleeting emotion or a nominal act of kindness; it is a way of being that opens us up to more acceptance of ourselves and others. It allows us to loosen the grips of fear that hold us in consistent judgment and allows us to see ourselves and others through a different lens. Compassion is a practice that allows us to acknowledge that our struggles, imperfections, and moments of vulnerability are not signs of inadequacy but rather what really can connect us deeply.

Self-Compassion

The path to embodying compassion begins within us. It is a courageous exploration of our internal world. It is a process of reframing the harsh self-criticism that so often weighs us down, and a process of embracing ourselves with kindness, understanding, and acceptance over and over again. As we embrace self-compassion, we learn to treat ourselves with the same nurturing care and understanding we would offer a dear friend. In doing so, we create a feeling of safety within ourselves, which allows for more deep rest, healing, and growth. Through self-compassion, we embrace our imperfections as part of our human experience, instead of beating ourselves up over them.

Sharing Compassion

As we develop self-compassion, our capacity for feeling and sharing compassion toward others naturally grows as well. In the space of compassionate awareness, we begin to see the world through a lens of connectedness, recognizing that beneath the surface, we are all seeking similar things like love, belonging, and a sense of peace and acceptance for who we really are.

Compassion allows us to approach others with curiosity and understanding, rather than judgment and defensiveness. We can begin to show up with others with a gentleness and presence. We can create the conditions for more authentic and meaningful connection.

Practicing Compassion

The path of compassion is not always an easy one. It requires courage and a willingness to explore our fears, insecurities, and conditioned patterns of judgment. However, the benefits are meaningful, and can include a greater sense of inner peace, a path to feeling more whole, and being part of and contributing to a more compassionate, kind, and connected world. 

Imagine what it would be like to live in a more compassionate inner and outer world. Imagine, at least for a moment, a world where compassion is our default operating system. 

What becomes possible when we let go of our consistent judgments? 

What becomes possible when our inner and outer relationships thrive on deep trust and respect? 

What becomes possible when you feel more at peace and connected with others?

I invite you to seek at least one small way to nurture and deepen your practice of compassion with yourself first then extend it outward today or this week. The practice of compassion is an empowering journey of self-discovery, letting go of harsh expectations, and feeling more love, softness, and connection that, at least for me, has been well worth the effort.