Learning to nurture ourselves is essential for our well-being. Over time we can forget what being nurtured feels like, and it may even become uncomfortable to accept nurturing from others as well. So we end up in a loop of discomfort, when we nurturing the most, but are unable to give it to ourselves and we reject it from others, which turns into many other emotions including anger, sadness, resentment, fear, and loneliness. Begin to speak to yourself like you would to a small child in need of care or treat yourself how you would like someone who loves you to treat you. Look for examples of nurturing that you can replicate within yourself. By practicing nurturing and self-compassion with ourselves we can move beyond those critical and negative voices in our heads, which can cause much of our fear and darkness to dissipate.

There is a lot of talk about gratitude this time of year, and many of us express thanks for things and people. But, I’d like you to consider if you are really taking the time to lean in to the feelings of gratitude, especially during a time of year that is filled with so much activity and often stress.

Self-care from a place of self-love replaces our easy button activities with ones that are good for our future selves. They are actions that will to allow us to wake up tomorrow feeling better and less tense.

I’ve been trying to understand self-love for a long time. I read a lot of articles and books and have written the words myself that we each absolutely deserve love and belonging, but they continued to be just words to me. The feeling of heaviness and self-loathing wasn’t really going away.

I realize now that there is a difference between self-care and self-love and that self-love has to exist internally to really evolve.

Continuing to remain curious and explore our reactions to our vulnerability and fear allows for realizations that ultimately create transformation. Discovering my automatic easy button, allows me to notice that I use it whenever I feel afraid or uncomfortable, and now something different can be done. I don't have to automatically push that button anymore. I don't have to always feel afraid.

If I’ve realized anything, it is that I am brave. And you can be too.
– Rachelle Niemann

I realize that I go silent here, sometimes for long stretches of time and I wanted to try and explain why that happens. I am a work in progress; I always will be. I am still learning and growing and honestly, I hope that continues forever. But sometimes during especially intense times of growth and discomfort, it’s all I can do is focus on the growth and lessons.

The truth is, for the past 3 years I’ve been in the midst of Act 2. Brene Brown discusses this as starting with an inciting incident. For me, this was the idea of becoming a parent and passing down my pain, fear, and shame to children and not being able to fully show up for them.

Spring has arrived; I’m here and I’m ready to create something real, something meaningful. If I can push through the darkness anyone can, and I’m here to support in any way I can.

When we allow ourselves to accept and feel the whole spectrum of emotions, more space for happiness is available. Striving to only feel one emotion all the time is unrealistic and unsustainable. Let's instead try to really feel all of our emotions, so, in turn, we can feel more happiness.

It was a rough week. I hesitated to discuss it here, but we must overcome the fear, shame, and judgement regarding mental health and wellness to heal. Let's start with kindness and compassion rather than fear.